Just thought I would share some scripture that I'm resting in today:
"Be still in the presence of the Lord, and wait patiently for him to act."~ Psalm 37:7, NLT
Psalm 10, (NIV)
1 Why, O LORD, do you stand far off?
Why do you hide yourself in times of trouble?
2 In his arrogance the wicked man hunts down the weak,
who are caught in the schemes he devises.
3 He boasts of the cravings of his heart;
he blesses the greedy and reviles the LORD.
4 In his pride the wicked does not seek him;
in all his thoughts there is no room for God.
5 His ways are always prosperous;
he is haughty and your laws are far from him;
he sneers at all his enemies.
6 He says to himself, "Nothing will shake me;
I'll always be happy and never have trouble."
7 His mouth is full of curses and lies and threats;
trouble and evil are under his tongue.
8 He lies in wait near the villages;
from ambush he murders the innocent,
watching in secret for his victims.
9 He lies in wait like a lion in cover;
he lies in wait to catch the helpless;
he catches the helpless and drags them off in his net.
10 His victims are crushed, they collapse;
they fall under his strength.
11 He says to himself, "God has forgotten;
he covers his face and never sees."
12 Arise, LORD! Lift up your hand, O God.
Do not forget the helpless.
13 Why does the wicked man revile God?
Why does he say to himself,
"He won't call me to account"?
14 But you, O God, do see trouble and grief;
you consider it to take it in hand.
The victim commits himself to you;
you are the helper of the fatherless.
15 Break the arm of the wicked and evil man;
call him to account for his wickedness
that would not be found out.
16 The LORD is King for ever and ever;
the nations will perish from his land.
17 You hear, O LORD, the desire of the afflicted;
you encourage them, and you listen to their cry,
18 defending the fatherless and the oppressed,
in order that man, who is of the earth, may terrify no more."
He is encouraging us and listening to our cry- in fact, He is not far off at all- He is holding us up and keeping our joy intact right now. We will forever pray for Rene, her baby girl, and Sherri and her baby, knowing full well that there is some reason that our paths crossed; praying that Rene and Sherri would turn from their troubled ways and find true peace in the salvation of our Lord through faith, especially for the sake of the two babies involved.
"For by grace you have been saved through faith; and that not of yourselves, it is the gift of God" Ephesians 2:8
Friday, October 23, 2009
Monday, October 19, 2009
Hoping the Third Time's the Charm
This is the email I received today from the agency regarding hearing something from Sherri- finally.
Marianne,
Yes, he was home. He told me that Sherri is in a halfway house. He didn’t know the address but he did provide me with her telephone number. M called Sherri late Saturday afternoon and Sherri told her that she is trying to get her life back together and she is going to allow her aunt (her mother’s sister) to raise the child. She has decided to take this approach because adoption is permanent and she may want to parent this child in the future. Her aunt is going to give her this option; we would not. I am so sorry this has happened to you. Please know that we are working diligently to find you the right birth mother. Please call us if you have any questions. ~ D
Well, YES, adoption is permanent!! That's the idea- to place the child in a stable, permanent home that she can't provide. But could she not have decided that she wanted to parent this child herself before she chose us and strung us along for more than two months?! Okay, my ranting is over, promise. We're really thinking that after these two experiences (not getting to meet the birth mothers), we should meet the next birth mother in person before we agree to be matched with her; make her think through her intentions and feelings sooner. We're just praying that the next person we're matched with is much more honest and solid in their decision, and that she'll be much further along in her pregnancy before we're even involved! Read my prior post for more info. We are hanging in there- thank you for all of the kind emails, facebook posts, and prayers.
To everyone who has been encouraging us: "I have not stopped giving thanks for you, remembering you in my prayers." Ephesians 1:16
Acts 1:7- "It is not for you to know the times or dates the Father has set by his own authority."
Marianne,
Yes, he was home. He told me that Sherri is in a halfway house. He didn’t know the address but he did provide me with her telephone number. M called Sherri late Saturday afternoon and Sherri told her that she is trying to get her life back together and she is going to allow her aunt (her mother’s sister) to raise the child. She has decided to take this approach because adoption is permanent and she may want to parent this child in the future. Her aunt is going to give her this option; we would not. I am so sorry this has happened to you. Please know that we are working diligently to find you the right birth mother. Please call us if you have any questions. ~ D
Well, YES, adoption is permanent!! That's the idea- to place the child in a stable, permanent home that she can't provide. But could she not have decided that she wanted to parent this child herself before she chose us and strung us along for more than two months?! Okay, my ranting is over, promise. We're really thinking that after these two experiences (not getting to meet the birth mothers), we should meet the next birth mother in person before we agree to be matched with her; make her think through her intentions and feelings sooner. We're just praying that the next person we're matched with is much more honest and solid in their decision, and that she'll be much further along in her pregnancy before we're even involved! Read my prior post for more info. We are hanging in there- thank you for all of the kind emails, facebook posts, and prayers.
To everyone who has been encouraging us: "I have not stopped giving thanks for you, remembering you in my prayers." Ephesians 1:16
Acts 1:7- "It is not for you to know the times or dates the Father has set by his own authority."
Thursday, October 15, 2009
Second Disappearing Birth Mother
Stunned is really the only word to describe how we felt when we got the news that this second birth mother who we were matched with disappeared as well. She was released from prison last Monday, 10/5, and the original plan was for the ladies from the agency to pick her up and help her move into one of their apartments right away. We had put together a care package for her and sent it off to the agency already (a letter from us, restaurant gift cards, magazines, books, a Bible, a book of puzzles, etc) to be given to her the day she got out.
She called the agency two days before she was released (Sat, 10/3) and said that her mother was going to visit and pick her up, they'd go shopping, and she'd come to the agency's apartments within a couple of days. They haven't heard from her since. They've tried calling her mother's cell, but it's been permanently disconnected, so they're taking that as a sign that Sherri (the birth mother) changed her mind. I don't think she'd had contact with her mother in a long time, and I don't think her mom originally knew she was pregnant. Seems a lot of things changed once she found out that she was, and my guess is that 'grandma' didn't want to lose a third grandchild. Sherri had already lost custody of one child to his father, and had placed another for adoption.
The agency is going to start showing our profile to other birth mothers (we're 'active' again) at this point, although at this moment, they have no unmatched birth mothers to whom they can show our profile. Wow- it's hard to understand God's plans sometimes, but that doesn't make them any less wonderful. What could be stranger than God in a manger, for example? We trust that his plans are perfect, and ours are not. But that doesn't mean this is easy. It's as though we've lost one baby the week she was to be born, and a second two months before. SO. DIFFICULT. We're trying to figure out what we're supposed to learn from this. Perseverance; definitely. Are we meant to be parents? Are we going the right route? Are we in God's will? We had thought so. I still think so. I really think He's using this horrible choice of the birth mother's to refine our trust, patience, and perseverance. From a worldly perspective, Sherri doesn't have any business with this child based on her prior record. Nonetheless, we'll be praying diligently for this child with the trust that God will use any bad experiences in his/her life to draw him/her closer to Him- and hopefully Sherri as well.
I just keep reminding myself of what a story of God's faithfulness we'll have to share with our future child someday- that both of these 'failures' brought us to them, and that they were no accident. No, indeed.
"The LORD is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit." Psalm 34:18
She called the agency two days before she was released (Sat, 10/3) and said that her mother was going to visit and pick her up, they'd go shopping, and she'd come to the agency's apartments within a couple of days. They haven't heard from her since. They've tried calling her mother's cell, but it's been permanently disconnected, so they're taking that as a sign that Sherri (the birth mother) changed her mind. I don't think she'd had contact with her mother in a long time, and I don't think her mom originally knew she was pregnant. Seems a lot of things changed once she found out that she was, and my guess is that 'grandma' didn't want to lose a third grandchild. Sherri had already lost custody of one child to his father, and had placed another for adoption.
The agency is going to start showing our profile to other birth mothers (we're 'active' again) at this point, although at this moment, they have no unmatched birth mothers to whom they can show our profile. Wow- it's hard to understand God's plans sometimes, but that doesn't make them any less wonderful. What could be stranger than God in a manger, for example? We trust that his plans are perfect, and ours are not. But that doesn't mean this is easy. It's as though we've lost one baby the week she was to be born, and a second two months before. SO. DIFFICULT. We're trying to figure out what we're supposed to learn from this. Perseverance; definitely. Are we meant to be parents? Are we going the right route? Are we in God's will? We had thought so. I still think so. I really think He's using this horrible choice of the birth mother's to refine our trust, patience, and perseverance. From a worldly perspective, Sherri doesn't have any business with this child based on her prior record. Nonetheless, we'll be praying diligently for this child with the trust that God will use any bad experiences in his/her life to draw him/her closer to Him- and hopefully Sherri as well.
I just keep reminding myself of what a story of God's faithfulness we'll have to share with our future child someday- that both of these 'failures' brought us to them, and that they were no accident. No, indeed.
"The LORD is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit." Psalm 34:18
Tuesday, September 22, 2009
Letters
We received a response letter from the birth mother on September 14th! We wrote her a couple of weeks before that, but the letter had to go through the agency, then to her, etc, so we've been anxiously awaiting a response :) When she chose us, she requested that we write her a letter in order to start up a relationship with her until we can meet her in person (she's in Houston). We wrote her a three-page letter, first and foremost thanking her for the amazing gift that she is choosing to give us, asking her a bunch of questions about herself, what she wanted the baby to know about her decision, and we told her a little more about ourselves.
In her response, she was actually very energetic and sweet- saying that she saw our young, smiling faces in our pictures and knew we were the ones, and that she's the life of the party usually but has been very tired. She said she eats and sleeps a lot to make the time pass quicker- which as she put it is "every pregnant woman's dream"! She also said that she wants this child to know that she doesn't view this adoption as 'giving the baby up', but rather as giving the baby a chance at life. She wrote about a page and a half, and said she'll have a lot more to say in person when she meets us (potentially in October)! We just continue to pray for favor and blessings in this process (for the baby, the birth mom, and us), and that this birth mom really would choose this time to make a change in her life for the better. We cannot wait to meet her! We're still hoping to find out the sex of the baby in October- we'll see!
It is also wonderful to think about the two of us and Kelly and Bryan starting out on this parenting journey at the same time. How neat it will be to have cousins who are the same age (birth mom is due ~12/14 and Kel is due ~12/7) and my sister to share this with and bounce questions and ideas off of...it just makes me smile. Sisters, best of friends, and moms at the same time.
1 John 4:16-17 "And so we know and rely on the love God has for us. God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in him. In this way, love is made complete among us so that we will have confidence on the day of judgment, because in this world we are like him."
In her response, she was actually very energetic and sweet- saying that she saw our young, smiling faces in our pictures and knew we were the ones, and that she's the life of the party usually but has been very tired. She said she eats and sleeps a lot to make the time pass quicker- which as she put it is "every pregnant woman's dream"! She also said that she wants this child to know that she doesn't view this adoption as 'giving the baby up', but rather as giving the baby a chance at life. She wrote about a page and a half, and said she'll have a lot more to say in person when she meets us (potentially in October)! We just continue to pray for favor and blessings in this process (for the baby, the birth mom, and us), and that this birth mom really would choose this time to make a change in her life for the better. We cannot wait to meet her! We're still hoping to find out the sex of the baby in October- we'll see!
It is also wonderful to think about the two of us and Kelly and Bryan starting out on this parenting journey at the same time. How neat it will be to have cousins who are the same age (birth mom is due ~12/14 and Kel is due ~12/7) and my sister to share this with and bounce questions and ideas off of...it just makes me smile. Sisters, best of friends, and moms at the same time.
1 John 4:16-17 "And so we know and rely on the love God has for us. God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in him. In this way, love is made complete among us so that we will have confidence on the day of judgment, because in this world we are like him."
Tuesday, August 18, 2009
A New Hope on this Roller Coaster Ride!!!
Wow, what a roller coaster ride!!! About six weeks ago, we received the terrible news that the previous birth mom/dad we had been matched with had moved out of the apartment prior to the birth without saying anything to the agency; we had been scammed. But how quickly new hope arrives!!! Last Friday, 8/14, we received news that a new birth mom has already chosen us!!!! What we know about her is that she is 4'11' and 113 pounds, brown hair, blue eyes, and that she is in Houston. We don't know anything about the birth father or the sex of the baby- we may find out the gender in October. She is due on Dec.14th, but originally they said Nov. 27th, so...the next appt with the doctor may give a better approximation? We are INCREDIBLY excited, and will love and pray for this baby and birth mom just the way we did the last one- with abandon, no matter what the outcome.
Because many of you have asked, here are our thoughts on the previous failed adoption (this was written before this new match):
Yes, God allows pain and evil to occur in as much as He gives all people free will. These birth parents were given free will, and they messed up royally and broke our hearts, yes. But God is comforting us and holding us up right now, like any loving father would. "The Lord also will be a refuge for the oppressed, A refuge in times of trouble. And those who know Your name will put their trust in You; For You, Lord, have not forsaken those who seek You." (Psalm 9.9-10) How in the WORLD could I hate Him when He is the one who first LOVED me and sent His Son to die for me? There is no greater love than that, and I shouldn't need any more 'proof' that God loves me beyond him being willing to die on a cross for me (and for those birth parents who scammed us, for everyone; for you). "But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us." Romans 5:8. He chose (and continually chooses) to love us abundantly and lavishly (even to death on a cross), and we did the same thing in preparing for that adopted baby girl. We knew there was a chance that the birth parents wouldn't choose to give up the baby, but we wanted to love on that baby and those birth parents anyway during those months of waiting. That's the same thing God does for us (to a million-times greater scale)- loves us even when we deny him and turn our backs on Him and pretend He doesn't exist (just like those birth parents did to us in the end). To God, we are worth it. Our eternal salvation is worth it. My and Andy's eventual pairing with a different baby is worth the pain of this couple who didn't end up choosing us.
That cliche saying that what doesn't kill us only makes us stronger is TRUE. "For our light affliction, which is but for a moment, worketh for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory." 2 Corinthians 4:17 This failed adoption situation has already brought Andy and I closer, brought both of us closer to God, and will only make us stronger in the end. I have full confidence in that. Every 'bad' or 'tough' situation I've been through has been turned into some good in the end. None of those things have been easy or always pleasant, but they have taught me so much and made me a better person because I leaned on God and sought to figure out what His plan was; what He was trying to teach me through each thing, and became closer to Him because of it. "And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose." Romans 8:28.
THANK YOU to everyone who has been supporting us through this.
Because many of you have asked, here are our thoughts on the previous failed adoption (this was written before this new match):
Yes, God allows pain and evil to occur in as much as He gives all people free will. These birth parents were given free will, and they messed up royally and broke our hearts, yes. But God is comforting us and holding us up right now, like any loving father would. "The Lord also will be a refuge for the oppressed, A refuge in times of trouble. And those who know Your name will put their trust in You; For You, Lord, have not forsaken those who seek You." (Psalm 9.9-10) How in the WORLD could I hate Him when He is the one who first LOVED me and sent His Son to die for me? There is no greater love than that, and I shouldn't need any more 'proof' that God loves me beyond him being willing to die on a cross for me (and for those birth parents who scammed us, for everyone; for you). "But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us." Romans 5:8. He chose (and continually chooses) to love us abundantly and lavishly (even to death on a cross), and we did the same thing in preparing for that adopted baby girl. We knew there was a chance that the birth parents wouldn't choose to give up the baby, but we wanted to love on that baby and those birth parents anyway during those months of waiting. That's the same thing God does for us (to a million-times greater scale)- loves us even when we deny him and turn our backs on Him and pretend He doesn't exist (just like those birth parents did to us in the end). To God, we are worth it. Our eternal salvation is worth it. My and Andy's eventual pairing with a different baby is worth the pain of this couple who didn't end up choosing us.
That cliche saying that what doesn't kill us only makes us stronger is TRUE. "For our light affliction, which is but for a moment, worketh for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory." 2 Corinthians 4:17 This failed adoption situation has already brought Andy and I closer, brought both of us closer to God, and will only make us stronger in the end. I have full confidence in that. Every 'bad' or 'tough' situation I've been through has been turned into some good in the end. None of those things have been easy or always pleasant, but they have taught me so much and made me a better person because I leaned on God and sought to figure out what His plan was; what He was trying to teach me through each thing, and became closer to Him because of it. "And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose." Romans 8:28.
THANK YOU to everyone who has been supporting us through this.
Monday, August 17, 2009
Matched Again Already!!!
My facebook post when we got the news on Friday, 8/14: "Aaaahhhhh, GOD IS SO GOOD!!!! We're matched again!!!!!!!!!! She's due Dec.14th and they don't know the sex of the baby yet. We're SO excited!!!! If you pray, please be praying this match works out!"
Saturday, July 4, 2009
Out of order: Katy Friends had a Beautiful Shower in Honor of Norah!
This post is out-of-date, but I wanted to include pictures, and I guess I've been slacking in my blogging lately! :) Our wonderful friends from Katy hosted a fabulous shower in honor of Norah Jane on June 13th, 2009. It was a such a special event that I can't wait to tell Norah about in the future. I definitely left feeling prayed over (and more importantly, so many prayers lifted for Norah and the birth mom), and also feeling so blessed to have so many people supporting us. We appreciate it more than I can possibly say!! Ephesians 1:16 says it better than I can: "I have not stopped giving thanks for you, remembering you in my prayers."Some more pictures...
The shower was at my great friend Heather's house!
Thank you VERY much to all of the friends who were the hostesses (Aimee, Amanda, Heather, Janet, Kim, Lacy, and Laura), and to everyone who came!
Cute, precious gifts for Norah!!
And I can't leave out the YUMMY, yummy food!!!
Only 6 more days until we meet little Norah Jane!!!
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