Well, I guess the next step in our journey to a child is to be back in Houston! Andy received word that he will be transferred to an ETC team at Chevron that does reservoir modeling- starting January 4th right after the holidays. Wow...I have to admit that it's difficult to move this much, but I know he won't have to do this his whole career- this may be the last move we do for a good number of years. It almost feels like we were just getting fully settled here! But we are so grateful to be moving back to Katy, where we have a wonderful group of friends that we left 2.5 years ago, and a great church home as well. We will miss friends in Lafayette and East Bayou tremendously! I feel especially bad about the fabulous friends here in Lafayette who have been so supportive about this adoption; threw us a shower, supported us when the bad news came (twice), and now I feel like I'm abandoning them before an adoption even happens :( I am so incredibly sorry. We will definitely have to come back to visit.
We can already see that it will be a positive thing to be back in the Houston area as far as the whole adoption situation is concerned, though. We'll be close enough to the agency to have the opportunity to meet the next birth mom in person before we agree to a match, and to form more of a relationship with her (if that's what she wants). We're still earnestly praying that one of the two unmatched birth moms (due in April and May) will choose us...
We went and looked at houses this past weekend, and found three that we really like. We put in an offer on the biggest of the three (in Cinco) on Monday evening, but the seller's realtor got back to us yesterday and said they can't agree to a close date of 1/5 (which is what we need- we're not allowed to close until 2010). So, we made an offer on our other favorite last night (in Grand Lakes)- we'll see what they say today!
Katy and Kingsland, here we come!!!
Wednesday, November 11, 2009
Monday, November 2, 2009
You're Not Going Under
I am constantly amazed at God's timing and the way He ties things together. Our pastor just taught on this passage last Wednesday, and then the weekly email I received from our former pastor in Illinois was on the same passage. The rest of what follows is Pastor James McDonald's 'Walk in the Word' weekly email- I don't want to take credit :) SO good...this verse in 1 Peter is incredibly encouraging to me.
"Therefore, those also who suffer according to the will of God shall entrust their souls to a faithful Creator in doing what is right." - 1 Peter 4:19
I've said it for years, there is nothing good that God brings into your life by way of transformation that He doesn't bring through the funnel of perseverance. If God can get that one characteristic into your life, He can truly make you what He wants you to be.
First Peter 4:19 encourages us with, "Therefore let those who suffer according to God's will entrust their souls to a faithful Creator while doing good."
Did you hear what you're supposed to do? Entrust your soul to your faithful Creator. God is faithful to you. He's got His hand on the thermostat. The fire will not get too hot. He's watching the depth gauge; this trial will not get too deep. God puts up the boundaries to your trials. "That's all. That's my daughter. I know what she can handle. Not that much. Not there. Not now." God protects His own. He will not allow you to be tried beyond what you are able to take. And in the middle of it all, He tells you to entrust yourself to His care.
God knows you better than you know yourself. You're not going to lose it; you're going to be okay. You don't know what you are capable of when you're resting in God's strength and not your own. You're going to get through this one way or another. It's not going to last forever and you will get through it - because God is faithful. He's not tired and He's not wondering when this is going to be over.
Reassure yourself, "I'm not going under." You can keep going for another day, another week because God is producing staying power in you. The ability to remain in that marriage - as hard as it is. The ability to remain in that job - as hard as it is. The ability to stick with it in that difficult circumstance - no matter what. If God can produce in you that staying power, He can give you everything else.
The good's not coming if you quit. Listen, God can get every characteristic of Christ into your life if He can just teach you to stay in the game.
~James McDonald, copyright Walk in the Word 11-2-09
"Therefore, those also who suffer according to the will of God shall entrust their souls to a faithful Creator in doing what is right." - 1 Peter 4:19, NASB. Another translation words it, "So then, those who suffer according to God's will should commit themselves to their faithful Creator and continue to do good" NIV. That's what Andrew and I are trying to do in the midst of the chaos- commit ourselves daily to live out our faith and trust in His plan, and continue "to do good."
"Therefore, those also who suffer according to the will of God shall entrust their souls to a faithful Creator in doing what is right." - 1 Peter 4:19
I've said it for years, there is nothing good that God brings into your life by way of transformation that He doesn't bring through the funnel of perseverance. If God can get that one characteristic into your life, He can truly make you what He wants you to be.
First Peter 4:19 encourages us with, "Therefore let those who suffer according to God's will entrust their souls to a faithful Creator while doing good."
Did you hear what you're supposed to do? Entrust your soul to your faithful Creator. God is faithful to you. He's got His hand on the thermostat. The fire will not get too hot. He's watching the depth gauge; this trial will not get too deep. God puts up the boundaries to your trials. "That's all. That's my daughter. I know what she can handle. Not that much. Not there. Not now." God protects His own. He will not allow you to be tried beyond what you are able to take. And in the middle of it all, He tells you to entrust yourself to His care.
God knows you better than you know yourself. You're not going to lose it; you're going to be okay. You don't know what you are capable of when you're resting in God's strength and not your own. You're going to get through this one way or another. It's not going to last forever and you will get through it - because God is faithful. He's not tired and He's not wondering when this is going to be over.
Reassure yourself, "I'm not going under." You can keep going for another day, another week because God is producing staying power in you. The ability to remain in that marriage - as hard as it is. The ability to remain in that job - as hard as it is. The ability to stick with it in that difficult circumstance - no matter what. If God can produce in you that staying power, He can give you everything else.
The good's not coming if you quit. Listen, God can get every characteristic of Christ into your life if He can just teach you to stay in the game.
~James McDonald, copyright Walk in the Word 11-2-09
"Therefore, those also who suffer according to the will of God shall entrust their souls to a faithful Creator in doing what is right." - 1 Peter 4:19, NASB. Another translation words it, "So then, those who suffer according to God's will should commit themselves to their faithful Creator and continue to do good" NIV. That's what Andrew and I are trying to do in the midst of the chaos- commit ourselves daily to live out our faith and trust in His plan, and continue "to do good."
Monday, October 26, 2009
Joy in Trials
These verses in James (one of my favorite books of the Bible) probably best describe what I know the purpose of all of these adoption trials is:
James 1:2-4, 12. "Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. Blessed is the man who perseveres under trial, because when he has stood the test, he will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him. James 1:2-4, 12.
God is definitely developing perseverance, showing us our faith is real and grounded, and teaching us that it is very possible to have joy in the midst of trials! What a valuable lesson that I am grateful to learn. We really are doing well, and life goes on- I had a Women's Ministry meeting on Fri night and then we hung out with our wonderful neighbors, we went to the UL Homecoming football game on Saturday and then had dinner (Old Tyme po' boys! YUM) with some great friends, and then a fantastic time at church and small group on Sunday.
My prayer: Lord, make Andrew and I mature and complete, lacking nothing. Help us to keep persevering through this trial and help us to keep choosing to have joy minute by minute and day by day. We love you and fully trust in your plan for us. We pray now for the baby who is meant to join our family in the future (who may be forming already!), that you would place a hedge of protection around that baby and the birth mother- that they would both be healthy. We also pray that you would bring this baby to a saving knowledge of you in the future. In Jesus' name, Amen!
PURE JOY!
James 1:2-4, 12. "Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. Blessed is the man who perseveres under trial, because when he has stood the test, he will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him. James 1:2-4, 12.
God is definitely developing perseverance, showing us our faith is real and grounded, and teaching us that it is very possible to have joy in the midst of trials! What a valuable lesson that I am grateful to learn. We really are doing well, and life goes on- I had a Women's Ministry meeting on Fri night and then we hung out with our wonderful neighbors, we went to the UL Homecoming football game on Saturday and then had dinner (Old Tyme po' boys! YUM) with some great friends, and then a fantastic time at church and small group on Sunday.
My prayer: Lord, make Andrew and I mature and complete, lacking nothing. Help us to keep persevering through this trial and help us to keep choosing to have joy minute by minute and day by day. We love you and fully trust in your plan for us. We pray now for the baby who is meant to join our family in the future (who may be forming already!), that you would place a hedge of protection around that baby and the birth mother- that they would both be healthy. We also pray that you would bring this baby to a saving knowledge of you in the future. In Jesus' name, Amen!
PURE JOY!
Friday, October 23, 2009
Thoughts
Just thought I would share some scripture that I'm resting in today:
"Be still in the presence of the Lord, and wait patiently for him to act."~ Psalm 37:7, NLT
Psalm 10, (NIV)
1 Why, O LORD, do you stand far off?
Why do you hide yourself in times of trouble?
2 In his arrogance the wicked man hunts down the weak,
who are caught in the schemes he devises.
3 He boasts of the cravings of his heart;
he blesses the greedy and reviles the LORD.
4 In his pride the wicked does not seek him;
in all his thoughts there is no room for God.
5 His ways are always prosperous;
he is haughty and your laws are far from him;
he sneers at all his enemies.
6 He says to himself, "Nothing will shake me;
I'll always be happy and never have trouble."
7 His mouth is full of curses and lies and threats;
trouble and evil are under his tongue.
8 He lies in wait near the villages;
from ambush he murders the innocent,
watching in secret for his victims.
9 He lies in wait like a lion in cover;
he lies in wait to catch the helpless;
he catches the helpless and drags them off in his net.
10 His victims are crushed, they collapse;
they fall under his strength.
11 He says to himself, "God has forgotten;
he covers his face and never sees."
12 Arise, LORD! Lift up your hand, O God.
Do not forget the helpless.
13 Why does the wicked man revile God?
Why does he say to himself,
"He won't call me to account"?
14 But you, O God, do see trouble and grief;
you consider it to take it in hand.
The victim commits himself to you;
you are the helper of the fatherless.
15 Break the arm of the wicked and evil man;
call him to account for his wickedness
that would not be found out.
16 The LORD is King for ever and ever;
the nations will perish from his land.
17 You hear, O LORD, the desire of the afflicted;
you encourage them, and you listen to their cry,
18 defending the fatherless and the oppressed,
in order that man, who is of the earth, may terrify no more."
He is encouraging us and listening to our cry- in fact, He is not far off at all- He is holding us up and keeping our joy intact right now. We will forever pray for Rene, her baby girl, and Sherri and her baby, knowing full well that there is some reason that our paths crossed; praying that Rene and Sherri would turn from their troubled ways and find true peace in the salvation of our Lord through faith, especially for the sake of the two babies involved.
"For by grace you have been saved through faith; and that not of yourselves, it is the gift of God" Ephesians 2:8
"Be still in the presence of the Lord, and wait patiently for him to act."~ Psalm 37:7, NLT
Psalm 10, (NIV)
1 Why, O LORD, do you stand far off?
Why do you hide yourself in times of trouble?
2 In his arrogance the wicked man hunts down the weak,
who are caught in the schemes he devises.
3 He boasts of the cravings of his heart;
he blesses the greedy and reviles the LORD.
4 In his pride the wicked does not seek him;
in all his thoughts there is no room for God.
5 His ways are always prosperous;
he is haughty and your laws are far from him;
he sneers at all his enemies.
6 He says to himself, "Nothing will shake me;
I'll always be happy and never have trouble."
7 His mouth is full of curses and lies and threats;
trouble and evil are under his tongue.
8 He lies in wait near the villages;
from ambush he murders the innocent,
watching in secret for his victims.
9 He lies in wait like a lion in cover;
he lies in wait to catch the helpless;
he catches the helpless and drags them off in his net.
10 His victims are crushed, they collapse;
they fall under his strength.
11 He says to himself, "God has forgotten;
he covers his face and never sees."
12 Arise, LORD! Lift up your hand, O God.
Do not forget the helpless.
13 Why does the wicked man revile God?
Why does he say to himself,
"He won't call me to account"?
14 But you, O God, do see trouble and grief;
you consider it to take it in hand.
The victim commits himself to you;
you are the helper of the fatherless.
15 Break the arm of the wicked and evil man;
call him to account for his wickedness
that would not be found out.
16 The LORD is King for ever and ever;
the nations will perish from his land.
17 You hear, O LORD, the desire of the afflicted;
you encourage them, and you listen to their cry,
18 defending the fatherless and the oppressed,
in order that man, who is of the earth, may terrify no more."
He is encouraging us and listening to our cry- in fact, He is not far off at all- He is holding us up and keeping our joy intact right now. We will forever pray for Rene, her baby girl, and Sherri and her baby, knowing full well that there is some reason that our paths crossed; praying that Rene and Sherri would turn from their troubled ways and find true peace in the salvation of our Lord through faith, especially for the sake of the two babies involved.
"For by grace you have been saved through faith; and that not of yourselves, it is the gift of God" Ephesians 2:8
Monday, October 19, 2009
Hoping the Third Time's the Charm
This is the email I received today from the agency regarding hearing something from Sherri- finally.
Marianne,
Yes, he was home. He told me that Sherri is in a halfway house. He didn’t know the address but he did provide me with her telephone number. M called Sherri late Saturday afternoon and Sherri told her that she is trying to get her life back together and she is going to allow her aunt (her mother’s sister) to raise the child. She has decided to take this approach because adoption is permanent and she may want to parent this child in the future. Her aunt is going to give her this option; we would not. I am so sorry this has happened to you. Please know that we are working diligently to find you the right birth mother. Please call us if you have any questions. ~ D
Well, YES, adoption is permanent!! That's the idea- to place the child in a stable, permanent home that she can't provide. But could she not have decided that she wanted to parent this child herself before she chose us and strung us along for more than two months?! Okay, my ranting is over, promise. We're really thinking that after these two experiences (not getting to meet the birth mothers), we should meet the next birth mother in person before we agree to be matched with her; make her think through her intentions and feelings sooner. We're just praying that the next person we're matched with is much more honest and solid in their decision, and that she'll be much further along in her pregnancy before we're even involved! Read my prior post for more info. We are hanging in there- thank you for all of the kind emails, facebook posts, and prayers.
To everyone who has been encouraging us: "I have not stopped giving thanks for you, remembering you in my prayers." Ephesians 1:16
Acts 1:7- "It is not for you to know the times or dates the Father has set by his own authority."
Marianne,
Yes, he was home. He told me that Sherri is in a halfway house. He didn’t know the address but he did provide me with her telephone number. M called Sherri late Saturday afternoon and Sherri told her that she is trying to get her life back together and she is going to allow her aunt (her mother’s sister) to raise the child. She has decided to take this approach because adoption is permanent and she may want to parent this child in the future. Her aunt is going to give her this option; we would not. I am so sorry this has happened to you. Please know that we are working diligently to find you the right birth mother. Please call us if you have any questions. ~ D
Well, YES, adoption is permanent!! That's the idea- to place the child in a stable, permanent home that she can't provide. But could she not have decided that she wanted to parent this child herself before she chose us and strung us along for more than two months?! Okay, my ranting is over, promise. We're really thinking that after these two experiences (not getting to meet the birth mothers), we should meet the next birth mother in person before we agree to be matched with her; make her think through her intentions and feelings sooner. We're just praying that the next person we're matched with is much more honest and solid in their decision, and that she'll be much further along in her pregnancy before we're even involved! Read my prior post for more info. We are hanging in there- thank you for all of the kind emails, facebook posts, and prayers.
To everyone who has been encouraging us: "I have not stopped giving thanks for you, remembering you in my prayers." Ephesians 1:16
Acts 1:7- "It is not for you to know the times or dates the Father has set by his own authority."
Thursday, October 15, 2009
Second Disappearing Birth Mother
Stunned is really the only word to describe how we felt when we got the news that this second birth mother who we were matched with disappeared as well. She was released from prison last Monday, 10/5, and the original plan was for the ladies from the agency to pick her up and help her move into one of their apartments right away. We had put together a care package for her and sent it off to the agency already (a letter from us, restaurant gift cards, magazines, books, a Bible, a book of puzzles, etc) to be given to her the day she got out.
She called the agency two days before she was released (Sat, 10/3) and said that her mother was going to visit and pick her up, they'd go shopping, and she'd come to the agency's apartments within a couple of days. They haven't heard from her since. They've tried calling her mother's cell, but it's been permanently disconnected, so they're taking that as a sign that Sherri (the birth mother) changed her mind. I don't think she'd had contact with her mother in a long time, and I don't think her mom originally knew she was pregnant. Seems a lot of things changed once she found out that she was, and my guess is that 'grandma' didn't want to lose a third grandchild. Sherri had already lost custody of one child to his father, and had placed another for adoption.
The agency is going to start showing our profile to other birth mothers (we're 'active' again) at this point, although at this moment, they have no unmatched birth mothers to whom they can show our profile. Wow- it's hard to understand God's plans sometimes, but that doesn't make them any less wonderful. What could be stranger than God in a manger, for example? We trust that his plans are perfect, and ours are not. But that doesn't mean this is easy. It's as though we've lost one baby the week she was to be born, and a second two months before. SO. DIFFICULT. We're trying to figure out what we're supposed to learn from this. Perseverance; definitely. Are we meant to be parents? Are we going the right route? Are we in God's will? We had thought so. I still think so. I really think He's using this horrible choice of the birth mother's to refine our trust, patience, and perseverance. From a worldly perspective, Sherri doesn't have any business with this child based on her prior record. Nonetheless, we'll be praying diligently for this child with the trust that God will use any bad experiences in his/her life to draw him/her closer to Him- and hopefully Sherri as well.
I just keep reminding myself of what a story of God's faithfulness we'll have to share with our future child someday- that both of these 'failures' brought us to them, and that they were no accident. No, indeed.
"The LORD is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit." Psalm 34:18
She called the agency two days before she was released (Sat, 10/3) and said that her mother was going to visit and pick her up, they'd go shopping, and she'd come to the agency's apartments within a couple of days. They haven't heard from her since. They've tried calling her mother's cell, but it's been permanently disconnected, so they're taking that as a sign that Sherri (the birth mother) changed her mind. I don't think she'd had contact with her mother in a long time, and I don't think her mom originally knew she was pregnant. Seems a lot of things changed once she found out that she was, and my guess is that 'grandma' didn't want to lose a third grandchild. Sherri had already lost custody of one child to his father, and had placed another for adoption.
The agency is going to start showing our profile to other birth mothers (we're 'active' again) at this point, although at this moment, they have no unmatched birth mothers to whom they can show our profile. Wow- it's hard to understand God's plans sometimes, but that doesn't make them any less wonderful. What could be stranger than God in a manger, for example? We trust that his plans are perfect, and ours are not. But that doesn't mean this is easy. It's as though we've lost one baby the week she was to be born, and a second two months before. SO. DIFFICULT. We're trying to figure out what we're supposed to learn from this. Perseverance; definitely. Are we meant to be parents? Are we going the right route? Are we in God's will? We had thought so. I still think so. I really think He's using this horrible choice of the birth mother's to refine our trust, patience, and perseverance. From a worldly perspective, Sherri doesn't have any business with this child based on her prior record. Nonetheless, we'll be praying diligently for this child with the trust that God will use any bad experiences in his/her life to draw him/her closer to Him- and hopefully Sherri as well.
I just keep reminding myself of what a story of God's faithfulness we'll have to share with our future child someday- that both of these 'failures' brought us to them, and that they were no accident. No, indeed.
"The LORD is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit." Psalm 34:18
Tuesday, September 22, 2009
Letters
We received a response letter from the birth mother on September 14th! We wrote her a couple of weeks before that, but the letter had to go through the agency, then to her, etc, so we've been anxiously awaiting a response :) When she chose us, she requested that we write her a letter in order to start up a relationship with her until we can meet her in person (she's in Houston). We wrote her a three-page letter, first and foremost thanking her for the amazing gift that she is choosing to give us, asking her a bunch of questions about herself, what she wanted the baby to know about her decision, and we told her a little more about ourselves.
In her response, she was actually very energetic and sweet- saying that she saw our young, smiling faces in our pictures and knew we were the ones, and that she's the life of the party usually but has been very tired. She said she eats and sleeps a lot to make the time pass quicker- which as she put it is "every pregnant woman's dream"! She also said that she wants this child to know that she doesn't view this adoption as 'giving the baby up', but rather as giving the baby a chance at life. She wrote about a page and a half, and said she'll have a lot more to say in person when she meets us (potentially in October)! We just continue to pray for favor and blessings in this process (for the baby, the birth mom, and us), and that this birth mom really would choose this time to make a change in her life for the better. We cannot wait to meet her! We're still hoping to find out the sex of the baby in October- we'll see!
It is also wonderful to think about the two of us and Kelly and Bryan starting out on this parenting journey at the same time. How neat it will be to have cousins who are the same age (birth mom is due ~12/14 and Kel is due ~12/7) and my sister to share this with and bounce questions and ideas off of...it just makes me smile. Sisters, best of friends, and moms at the same time.
1 John 4:16-17 "And so we know and rely on the love God has for us. God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in him. In this way, love is made complete among us so that we will have confidence on the day of judgment, because in this world we are like him."
In her response, she was actually very energetic and sweet- saying that she saw our young, smiling faces in our pictures and knew we were the ones, and that she's the life of the party usually but has been very tired. She said she eats and sleeps a lot to make the time pass quicker- which as she put it is "every pregnant woman's dream"! She also said that she wants this child to know that she doesn't view this adoption as 'giving the baby up', but rather as giving the baby a chance at life. She wrote about a page and a half, and said she'll have a lot more to say in person when she meets us (potentially in October)! We just continue to pray for favor and blessings in this process (for the baby, the birth mom, and us), and that this birth mom really would choose this time to make a change in her life for the better. We cannot wait to meet her! We're still hoping to find out the sex of the baby in October- we'll see!
It is also wonderful to think about the two of us and Kelly and Bryan starting out on this parenting journey at the same time. How neat it will be to have cousins who are the same age (birth mom is due ~12/14 and Kel is due ~12/7) and my sister to share this with and bounce questions and ideas off of...it just makes me smile. Sisters, best of friends, and moms at the same time.
1 John 4:16-17 "And so we know and rely on the love God has for us. God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in him. In this way, love is made complete among us so that we will have confidence on the day of judgment, because in this world we are like him."
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